Are you one of those moms that has a to do list for everything and you constantly feel like you aren't getting anything done?
I was and let me tell you something it really stressed me the heck out. I would work my tushy off all day and night and still feel like the biggest damn failure. I mean no matter how much I had gotten done there was still just so much more to do.
Recently my hubbby had an appointment with one of his docs. This was one of those long ones where they want to review everything and see what is and isn't working. He asked me to come along.
As she talked to him and then asked me to confirm or eloborate she made a statement that totally threw me off guard. She looked at him and said, "On paper your life, the stress load of your family, and everything you guys have going on should not work."
"What!?!" I didn't say it, but I sure was thinking that.
She eloborated with the fact that we have special needs kids, my husband has his issues from being in the military, and the things I have been through in life would cause most marriages to fall apart. We were the exception and she placed a large part of that at my feet since I was sort of the glue that makes this crazy life work.
I have to say it made me feel good that she told him he was lucky and that I was awesome. And after I accepted it. ( You all know I have a problem with believing I am awesome right?) I realized she had no idea how long this has all took to work out.
And it all started with a to do list like most mom's have. Impossible!
I used to make myself crazy in a day trying to manage and make sure that everyone's this and that got done. I used to constantly pour more and more into that list. I would not celebrating even the littlest of wins. I would not cut myself slack.
And the worst part. I was not even on my own list. I had nothing on there that was for me.
That list use to make me the craziest woman on the planet. No joke. And I am sure I am not alone. If your are still reading this then maybe, just maybe you have one of these darn crazy lists right now.
So what changed for me?
What did I do to make that list not drive me crazy? No I did not throw it out the window. Although there were days I did just that when it was not working.
I found a little secret I am going to share with you. Shhhhhh come closer. This one is going to blow your mind. The One Big No No you should not be putting on your to do list is......
Stop trying to shove square pegs into round holes!
What? I can hear you saying it right now. What the heck are you talking about? You have totally lost me now.
Think about your list. Better yet pull out your to do list right now. Are there things on that list that aren't really your job to be doing or try and be making happen? Like making your spouse do a chore or forcing your kid to do something like homework or clean their room. Really look at your list. Which things on here really aren't things you have control over? Don't put stuff on your list that isn't yours to do!
I found a lot of them in my day when I did this. Lots and lots of wasted time and added stress. Stress I didn't need and time I wanted. And I realized that I had trying to shove square pegs in round holes.
I was reminded of this when listening to an audio today on Time Management in a product called the Inner Circle. One of the exercised in that audio was to list all the things that you had on your to do list that really weren't things you could control.
It made me smile because I realized how far I have come in the last two years.
I mean who wouldn't feel awesome after they stopped trying to do the impossible all the time. Try it right now. What impossible task can you mark off your list today? What square peg can you put down and walk away from now? It's okay. I give you premission to feel good and give yourself the freedom you deserve.
This one little change could be the catalyst to do that one thing you have always wanted to do with your life! This could be the beginning to you living your life on purpose and out loud.
Leave the worry and the stress out of your day.
Take action now,